Spousal Acceptance of Polish

Many of you have asked about this - both gals and guys - so I will take a shot at the question. But, I would like to hear from you as well since we all have different experiences that others can also learn by.

I will start with answering the question for the women. A number of gals have asked me how to get their husbands/BF to do anything to improve the look and condition of their ugly feet. And they ask this because many men will not even consider having a pedicure just to get their feet into a presentable condition because they feel that it is not 'manly'. Some women would even like their guy to try out polish on their feet, but are met with rejection because "guys don't wear nail polish".
Well, some guys actually do.

We have all have been programmed from a very early age to act in certain ways and to beleive that certain things are true. And those beliefs are very hard to change. But the key to changing those ideas is that we have to have a reason to change. And it has to be something that we think is valuable and beneficial to us, and not something that anyone else can force on us if we don't want it.

For example, let's say that you are grossed out by his ugly feet whenever he goes barefoot or wears sandals. That probably means that he is not going to receive any favorable attention from you when he does, and probably he'll get less than complimentary comments as well. But, if you present him with a solution that he beleives will change the way you react to him when he does this, he may then have a reason to change his behavior. It might be a gradual or stepped process to help him get there without enduring a huge leap, so be ready to work it out. And it may take lots of encouragement too!

The thing he is probably the most concerned about is riducule and rejection if he does something that others feel is not appropriate. What you have to do is convince him that what you like and want him to do is more important than what others think. That their perception is not yours and his reality. If he beleives that you like it and there will be benefits from doing it (that outweight any downsides), he'll go for it. Guys can be pretty open-minded when you remove the hurdles.

It may take time and patience, so don't expect him to cave right away. But keep up the compliments and encouragement and you will make progress. Try talking him into going with you for a pedicure early on a Saturday morning when the nail salon is quiet (call ahead and arrange this). You and he can then relax and enjoy the treat without him fearing any unwanted attention. Ideally, you locate a salon that enthusiastically caters to both men and women so that he sees other guys there too. There are more and more salons wiseing up to attracting male clients because they know it means more business, and repeat customers.

You might even start with giving him a pedicure yourself at home if you are up to it so that he can experience the benefits privately and learn to associate them with being with you. Many men like this kind of personal attention and are more inclined to agree when a trusted friend is involved.

Talking him into trying polish may be as easy as having clear be a part of the routine pedicure. You could even suggest a non-gloss clear like OPI Nail Envy to make his nails look much cleaner but without the shine. Moving to color will take a bit more finesse and you may need to scope out a good 'guy color' before hand so that you will already know how it will look. Bolder guys will jump right in with a little encouragement, and so you can be a bit more creative here. But pay attention to his comfort factor so that you don't go over the line. If you do and he reacts , you may have to start at 'square one' again.

If he will agree to wearing his nails polished in private, for your eyes only, that may be one way to get him more comfortable with the idea and avoid the 'what others think' issue. At least in time, he will become used to it and may even like it himself. A surprising number of men who have tried this, even with being quite unsure at first, have ended up really liking wearing their nails polished because it's fun - same reason why many women do it!


Well, what is your experience? I'd like to hear how you may have talked your guy into tyring polish, and what your successes have been.

Next time, I'll explore this from the guy's side. How to get your wife/GF to warm up to it.

Why Do We hide?

You know, I have been openly wearing my toenails polished for quite a while now, but it wasn't always that way. I used to keep them hidden and my wife was the only one who would see and appreciate them. But something happened a few years ago that changed all that...and it was all in my head.

Many guys who wear their toenails polished (and yes, there are a surprising number of guys who actually do this today!) feel like they have to keep them under wraps. Doesn't that seem crazy when you consider how much time and effort goes into keeping your toenails looking good? Ladies, how would you feel if you had just spent a bunch of $$ and effort getting your hair colored and styled, just to have to wear it under a veil?
But there are reasons why guys do this, so let's explore a few of them.

1) They feel something is wrong with it.
Okay, I think everyone can understand where that's coming from. Boys are taught from a very young age (after about five anyway) that wearing things that are generally considered feminine is a sign of weakness (for men, anyway), and boys are not weak - they're tough! And so, they go through their life thinking that they have do exclusively boy things or someone will think they are weak and not worthy of being a guy.
Well, you do have to consider that those beliefs were put into your head when things were different. Back then, girls didn't do tough things, get tattoos, wear their hair really short, wear jeans or trousers, wear black nail polish or wear or do very much guy stuff. Back then, men didn't wear earrings or stay home and take care of the kids, highlight their hair, wear bright-colored shirts or wear any kind of cosmetics either, like they do now.
Well folks, welcome to the 21st century! We live in a time where people are allowed (they have to have permission...?) to be themselves, and they are even encourged to explore what they like and discover who they really are. And styles have changed too (as they always will). Men now wear nail polish. And there are even companies that design nail polish intended for men in colors that look masculine.
It's not 'wrong' anymore.

2) I will be rejected.
Yeah, maybe so. But then, when were you last able to please everyone you met? In fact, how is this even possible when you consider how many opinions and viewpoints there are in the world? About 1.001 times the number of people there are. (some have multiple personalities...)
No, I have come to the conclusion that it's much, much easier and enjoyable being me, and not someone else. And you know what? I think I'm much better at it than anyone else too! So, if you think about it, the people who have a problem with a guy wearing nail polish, or even a girl wearing work boots have the problem. And it's not you or your problem. You're enjoying life as it was meant to be. They're getting caught up in guilt trips, hangups and trying to unload their opinions on to you. Once you understand that simple concept, the rejection issue turns around and is directed toward them instead.

3) Someone may not like it.
Uh, okay. See #2 above on this one too.

4) I will feel uncomfortable.
Then don't wear it. Seriously, if you don't feel comfortable, no one else will either.
On the other hand (or foot), if you truly enjoy wearing your nails polished, and it brings you joy and satisfaction, then others will pick up on that too and they will accept it as a part of you, and quite possibly like it too. There have been more than a few opinions turned around by confident and content people doing something different.
It's call a 'trend'.

5) What will my friends say?
Hey, if they really are your friends, they'll accept it because it's a part of you. And they already like you, so you're one step ahead.

6) What will my family say?
I dunno. Try it and see. They already know you pretty well, so this should not seem so far-fetched to them because chances are, if you're a guy into nail polish, you've probably already done some things that were 'different' already, and they survived it.

Wearing your nails polished is not a life and death thing, guys. It's just paint, and it will not change your sexual preference or make your manhood fall off. It's just a style that is emerging and it's actually pretty cool to have great-looking nails for a change. Polished fingernails are pretty high maintenance when you consider how active most guys, and some girls are with their hands, but polished toenails are a way to not only vastly improve the look of your feet, but have a little fun and stir up some interest too. When you wear your toenails polished, you tend to take better care of your feet too (because people will notice them more often), and let's face it, most guy's feet can really use some 'improving' (am I right girls?). Look at how popular it currently is with women. They are smarter than you might give them credit for...!

Guys can really wear pretty much any color of polish on their toenails, but if you are just starting out, I might suggest that you begin with more masculine colors like black, brown, gray, or even dark blue and green. Save the reds and bolder colors for when you mature in this style and to help bring along the people around you. They'll adjust alright if you take it in reasonable steps.

So, does that change the way you think about this at all? Do you still need to hide your polished toes? Weakling!!!!

What I am wearing today:

BB Couture Ceremony from the Formal Collection

Thank you for reading

- and commenting too!